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Counseling 101

03 Thursday Nov 2011

Posted by in Comedy, Family, Funny, Relationship Ridiculousness

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There are a few things you should know about me:

  • I’m working on a Master’s in Clinical Mental Health, and am currently in a class that requires me to make practice videos demonstrating various counseling skills.
  • Jay is always my subject.
  • I don’t give him topics, he comes up with issues on his own.
  • Jay recently watched an episode of Rachael Ray with me, featuring Buddy Velastro as a guest.
  • Jay has a super duper funny Cake Boss voice.
Last night, in making another practice video, Jay came to the counselor as a client who was depressed because his girlfriend had broken up with him due to an unhealthy obsession with Cake Boss. The worst part about this exercise was that  none of it was planned, so I had to take each new fact as though it was completely normal.  Through FOUR TAKES of a ten minute video, I discovered the following things about the scenario:
We met at our step aerobics class.  She only had 80 more pounds to lose, and I fell head over heels in love.
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I’m so depressed, it was the most in love I’ve ever been in my whole life.  It was the best two weeks of my life. 
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We loved to take long walks together….well, long for her, she had a prosthetic leg.
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She was amazing…4’7″, just a BUNDLE of energy and joy.
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I don’t see what I did wrong – at the beginning she loved cooking with me!  I don’t see what’s so wrong about wanting to create 4 or 5 cakes a day.
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She said I should be able to control accidentally slipping into a Cake Boss character all the time.  I can’t help it!  He’s just so inspiring. 
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She said that there was something unnatural about a man who loved another man who bakes all day. After that, I told her to hit the road.  
I have no idea where homeboy comes UP with this stuff, but I know for sure that I’ll always be great at keeping a straight face when the crazies come to call.
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Also, there was fake crying and a slipping in and out of a effeminate-Jersey-esque accident.