Today we just have to talk about poop. Sometimes it just has to happen, you know?
No but really, this is a real thing. My mom is really teeny and sweet and dainty and proper, but also she had 4 kids with no drugs (ugh) and when you have kids weird things happen to your body because there is A KID pressing against your innards and sometimes ish gets kind of janky in there, ya know?
I’m old enough now that I’ve had friends with babies for years, but recently it’s gotten kind of out of control. It’s a thing I guess where you go through a phase where everyone gets married all at once, which is a hella expensive few years, and then they all start having kids roughly at the same time. We’re THERE. We got married later than most of our friends and ain’t got no babies, but people all over our lives are popping out kids. And when people pop out kids I like to take them food because duh.
So, it casually came up in a conversation over wine with my mom that my friends talk about constipation before and after pregnancy, and she was all “yeah, I know, that never happened to me. My midwife brought me bran muffins and said ‘trust me, just eat these and don’t ask questions’ and I was just fine!”
Boom. Must find bran muffin recipe and make for every human I know who is having kids or just likes pooping on the reg ASAP. I’ve made these several times so far, and can’t keep them in the house. Everyone who’s tried them has been a big fan, which I consider a feat because sometimes bran has a really kind of…specific…texture in baked goods I think. But these are REALLY good, and don’t have a ton of added sugar and not very much fat, which means you can 100% eat them for breakfast with no judgement from me. Or yourself.
I threw my first baby shower last week! For Scott and Belen! And then we went on vacation and THEY HAD THEIR BABY IN THEIR HOUSE by accident which I will tell you about in more detail at a later time.
But first we need to talk about this shower. I was a little nervous because it came on a really really busy week and Jay had been out of town and also Belen is always doing really cute things and my MO is kind of “give them booze and meatballs and maybe they’ll like you?” Not so much with the cuteness.
But then I Pinterested “winter baby shower” because I had it in my head that I wanted to do a winter/Christmas thing, and I saw a chalkboard that said Baby It’s Cold Outside and I just kind of ran with that. So! Here is what the non-Pinteresty boozehound did.